Here, five secrets for making friendships last, no matter what obstacles life throws at you.

Don’t Let Her Drift Away
“We’re often drawn to people based on common interests and circumstances – and when life changes, the friendship can become vulnerable,” says psychiatrist Paul Dobransky. Try to think of these “friend shifts” as a temporary setback and give each other some extra TLC. If you’re a mom, get your partner or a sitter to watch the kid and go out and have a cocktail with your girlfriend. Child-free corporate climber? Hit the park with your bud and her baby.

Stop Obsessing Over The Way Things Used To Be
Rather than grasping at the past, reconnect by accepting your new lives and roles within the friendship when they change. “The key is taking the time to find out what’s important to each other now,” Dobransky says.

Quit Making Excuses
Make a firm commitment to find some time for each other, even if it’s a phone date. “When you make vague plans and don’t follow up, you run the risk of weeks turning into months and months turning into years, and suddenly you’re strangers,” says sociologist and friendship expert Jan Yager.

Don’t Let Facebook Replace Face Time
Think of texts and online messages as supplements to – not replacements for – person-to-person interaction. “As humans, we’re innately wired for in-person socialising, not electronic mini check-ins,” Dobransky says.

Be There When It Counts
When the pressure is really on at work, your boss knows you’ll drop everything and stay late to finish that project. When one of your friends is going through a rough time, she should know that you’ll offer her the same kind of dedicated support. “It’s less about the words you say, and more about being there for someone you love when she needs you most,” says social worker Mary Jo Barrett.