All We *Really* Want for Christmas… Are These 12 Sexual Favours

Hold the partridge in a pear tree, please.


Jamie Hergenrader |

You know the classic The 12 Days of Christmas carol, but we’d prefer it if our true love gave us 12 days of body-tingling, toe-curling ecstasy instead (not sure what we’d do with three French hens and eight maids-a-milking, anyway). Check out our wish list below for sexy ideas that’ll keep the merriment going far into the New Year. ‘Tis the season of giving, but receiving feels so damn good.

One Hot Make-Out Session

While we love other kinds of oral activity, we also appreciate a good old-fashioned kiss (bonus points for mistletoe!). It might look innocent on the outside, but it’ll linger in our minds much longer.

Two Beat-The-Alarm Bangs

No matter the method — roaming hands, gentle neck kisses, some morning oral — getting the job done before the blaring BEEP, BEEP, BEEP will undoubtedly put us in a better mood the rest of the day.

READ MORE: Nipple Play Just Got So Much Better, With These 10 Sex Positions

Three Spontaneous Sexcapades

Kitchen counter while baking Christmas cookies? A quickie in his parents’ bathroom? Even getting cozy next to the tree (uh, who knew it was the perfect mood lighting?!). The gift of spontaneous sex is always appreciated.

Four Solo Session Assists

After we’ve already started getting all worked up, our partners can swoop in to finish the job however we see fit.

READ MORE: Everything You Need to Know Before Buying A New Vibrator

Five More Minutes of Foreplay

Sex is fun (understatement of the century), but by sticking to hand-and-mouth action for a bit longer, we’ll give our other erogenous zones (read: neck, ears, inner thighs, nipples and back) the attention they deserve.

Six Oral Sexy Times

Yep, this is what we were thinking about during that tongue-all-over make-out. Time to direct those moves down south.

Seven Role-Play Rolls in the Hay

Kinda like that fancy yoga mat or perfume we not-so-subtly hinted at: If we’ve mentioned a particular fantasy we want, act on it. Fifty Shades? Throw on a tie, get out those handcuffs, and tell us what to do. We’ll bring the props… and our imagination. *Wink*.

READ MORE: A Beginner’s Guide To BDSM, With Tips From A Sex Therapist

Eight Period-Sex Parties

It’s like normal sex with built-in lube. And, hey, red is a festive colour this time of year!

Nine Nights of Domination

Even if we’re usually the submissive one, we know how to get us off. So let us run the show at least a few times.

10 Steamy Presents

Instead of secret Santa, how about we play sexy Santa? Buy us a new toy, sexy lingerie, or edible underwear. (Hey, why not?) We love unwrapping new gifts we can play with right away. Bow chika wow wow.

11 Scrub-a-Dub-Dubs in the Tub

When it’s boiling outside, nothing feels better than a cold shower or bubble bath together. Plus, watching ourselves in the bathroom mirror? Heyyyy.

READ MORE: Here’s Exactly How To Make Yourself Squirt During Sex

12 Booty Licks

We couldn’t leave out rim jobs — butts need love, too!

This article was originally published on www.womenshealthmag.com

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