7 Common Reasons Why You Don’t Feel Like Sex
Photography by Jonathan Taylor
Do you love sex but are baffled when you just really don’t feel up to it?
It could be your habits holding you back. We asked women’s health specialist Jennifer Wider, for the most common reasons your sex drive might take a nose dive…
1. You Drink Too Much
Everyone knows that when guys overdo it with the alcohol, it affects their performance. But it turns out that when you throw back too many glasses of vino, it can have a similar effect. “Yes, alcohol can lower your inhibitions, but if you drink more than one drink, it can also decrease your sexual performance – and your libido in general,” says Wider. What’s more, booze is a depressant, and it can interfere with your sexual function.
2. You’re On Anti-Depressants
These can also wreak havoc on your libido. “Studies show that up to 30 percent of people taking anti-depressants can experience sexual side effects, including lowered libido and orgasm difficulties,” says Wider.
3. You’re Popping Other Drugs Too
Anti-depressants aren’t the only drug that can lower your libido; other everyday meds can do it, too: “Birth control, anti-histamines, decongestants, and high-blood pressure medication can all interfere with a person’s sex drive,” says Wider. Ask your doctor if you suspect any of your meds may be hurting your libido.
4. You Don’t Sleep Enough
Too little shut eye can mess with your mojo. And it’s not just that you’re too tired to have sex, either (although that’s definitely part of it). “Getting enough sleep is vital for your body to function at 100 percent,” says Wider. “If you skimp on sleep, you may lessen your libido – and also have a harder time climaxing in bed.” Aim for seven to eight hours a night if you can.
5. You’re Overweight
Carrying extra kilos may decrease your sex drive and your performance in bed, says Wider. And certain medical conditions are linked to obesity, like diabetes and high cholesterol, can also impact your libido. The good news? Losing weight can fix these issues.
6. You Don’t Know How Hot You Are
It may sound cheesy, but it’s so true: Having a poor body image can totally mess with your sex life. “The brain-body connection plays an integral role in a person’s sexual desire and ability to perform,” says Wider. “If you have negative thoughts about your body, it can translate directly into the bedroom.”
7. You Have a Super Busy Social Life
Yes, going out all the time is fun and it’s really healthy to have a strong social network. But doing so can lead to fatigue, exhaustion, stress and lack of intimate time with your partner – meaning sex takes a backseat. “Planning intimate time with your partner is definitely a challenge for many couples,” says Wider. So if you feel yourself saying yes to co-workers and no to your significant other, take a minute to assess your priorities and make sure you’re not spreading yourself too thin to enjoy a good romp.